Azn Badger's Blog

What About the Lysine Contingency…?

Remember That One Time Chucky Cut A Promo On WCW?

You’d think having Chucky from the Child’s Play movies show up on a wrestling show would be considered jumping the shark, right?

Well, technically I suppose it would be, if not for the fact that it basically already happened by the time 1998 came rollin’ along… More than once.

That being said, guest stars, fictional or otherwise, have been commonplace in wrestling for some time now.

WCW in particular, during the Monday Night Wars, seemed to have a penchant for populating it’s telecasts with all manner of larger than life non-wrestlers.

Chuck Norris, Jay Leno, a number of NBA players, and even fuckin’ Robocop all made guest appearances on the show at one time or another, with predictably hilarious results.

Yeah, that actually happened.

So, when you take into consideration all the bullshit that came before it, having Chucky cut a promo during an episode of Nitro actually isn’t all that silly after all.

… That is until you take a minute to listen to what he’s actually saying.

With Leno, WCW actually went to great lengths to write him into a storyline.

Believe it or not, it was actually a big fucking deal.

DDP, Hogan, and Eric Bischoff actually showed up on the Tonight Show and caused a ruckus, creating significant cross-promotional buzz.

Sure, the actual in-ring pay-off was horrendous, but it’s hard to deny the cleverness of their marketing strategy.

Which brings us to Chucky.

Near as I can tell, Chucky showed up to promote his film, as is typically the case with any movie stars/homicidal doll monsters that guest star on wrestling shows, however WCW went the extra mile and had him pick a favorite to win in the upcoming Halloween Havoc.

It should be noted that the main event of the Halloween Havoc in question, Hogan vs. Ultimate Warrior; would go on to be regarded as one of the single worst matches in all of televised professional wrestling.

Yeah, that also really happened.

Now, as far as I can recall, Chucky never physically appeared on WCW, but for whatever goddamn reason, the writers saw fit to have him favor Scott Steiner over his brother Rick in their upcoming match.

Last time I checked, Chucky was more concerned with reclaiming his body and killing stupid bitches than he was the daily affairs of professional wrestling, but hey, this was the same team of writers that thought having the slowest goddamn Robocop in the history of slow-ass Robocops appear on their show was a good idea.

Anyway, at some point, Chucky mentions something about wanting to be a film director, and that he wants Scott Steiner to win because he’s hoping to cast him as his leading man.

There is so much fucking wrong with that last sentence, that honestly, I’m not even gonna’ go into it.

The really sad part in all this, is the fact that they actually got Brad Dourif to voice Chucky.

I mean, yeah, Chucky isn’t Chucky without Brad Dourif’s considerable vocal talents, but come on, the man deserves so much better than to get paid to do wrestling promos and super-liminal advertising.

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Lucas Stuck His Chubby Fingers In The Star Wars Pie… AGAIN.

Damn George, lay off the pie...

George Lucas was, at one point in time; a visionary.

Said “point” in time lasted about 5 minutes.

Through films like THX 1138, the man demonstrated his eye for visuals; as well as his weakness in the areas of narrative and storytelling.

Films like American Graffiti, as well as some of the later entries in the Star Wars and Indiana Jones series made clear the man’s love for hot rod/car culture.

Given the ludicrous number of references to pre-existing films that are featured in the Star Wars films, it’s tough to say just how legit the man’s creativity was, but that’s not the subject of today’s article and I’d prefer not to get into to it for the sake of avoiding the inevitable case of carpal tunnel that would likely emerge if I were to attempt to address such an issue at length.

*AHEM!* That being said, despite all the wonderful franchises and stories that George Lucas has given us over the years, ever since the release of the Star Wars Special Edition series in the late 90’s, there’s been a recurring theme of “control freak-ery” regarding Mr. Lucas.

With seemingly every successive release of the Star Wars series (of which there have been many) numerous tweaks have been made, ranging from the major to the infinitesimal in regards to their impact on the overall package.

With the impending release of the Star Wars series on blu ray, (as well as the upcoming 3-D theatrical re-re-releases) it has been confirmed that more minor tweaks are on the horizon.

An article at Topless Robot covering each of these changes in detail can be found here.

Aside from R2-D2 hiding behind rocks that are physically impassible given his proportions, and Yoda being changed to a CGI character in Episode I, (a change I think is actually for the better) the one of these changes that stuck out the most to me, was that of the audio for Obi-Wan’s Krayt Dragon cry that he used to scare off the Tusken Raiders in Episode IV.

In my mind, the original audio had him sounding like a high pitched fire alarm mixed with a Dewback call.

Given, that’s just me going by memory, as it’s been a few years since I’ve seen A New Hope.

Anyway, this new version of Obi-Wan’s scream, sounds just plain weird to me:

I guess Lucas wanted to change it because, let’s face it; despite the series’ unbelievable sound design, Obi-Wan’s yell did indeed sound like a mish-mash of familiar elements, but even so; this sounds just plain odd to me.

It’s like the audio sounds too crisp for the video or some shit.

Oh yeah, and don’t pretend for a minute that it doesn’t remind you of this:

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Video Feature: Self-Destruction of The Ultimate Warrior Pt. 8… Or 9… In Any Case It’s The Last One.


Got back in town last night, so expect a legit article tomorrow.

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Video Feature: Self-Destruction of The Ultimate Warrior Pt. 7 or 8… Nobody Cares At This Point.

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Video Feature: Self-Destruction of The Ultimate Warrior Pt. 6.. Or Is That 7?

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Video Feature: Self-Destruction of The Ultimate Warrior Pt. 5(?)


Apparently part 5 got excised from Youtube due to copyright issues. Oh well, no loss.

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Video Feature: Self-Destruction of The Ultimate Warrior Pt. 4

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Video Feature: Self-Destruction of The Ultimate Warrior Pt. 3

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Video Feature: Self-Destruction of The Ultimate Warrior Pt. 2

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Video Feature: Self-Destruction of The Ultimate Warrior Pt. 1

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