Azn Badger's Blog

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The Azn Badger In Portland: A Story In Pictures

Pictured: The Azn Badger and Portlandia.

As mentioned in the previous few posts on this blog, I took a trip down to Portland few a few days this week.

I’d only been to Portland once before, as a very young child; so in heading down to Oregon, I honestly didn’t know what to expect from the city.

While I’d rather not bog this post down with extraneous details regarding my adventures in Portland, I will say this:

Portland gave me tasty waffles via a window, and for that I give the city a thumbs up.

Anyway, you’re probably wondering what’s up with the photo at the top of this post, so allow me to explain.

A long time ago, when my brother went to live in Japan for awhile, I remember him bringing some lucha libre masks with him.

During his time over there, he ended up taking photos of himself and his friends wearing these masks, seemingly just for shits and giggles.

Anyway, given the fact that I myself happen to own a few luchador masks, I figured I should do my duty as the “little brother” and follow in my brother’s footsteps.

That being said, the photo above, and those that follow represent my trip to Portland… While wearing a Rey Mysterio Jr. mask.

Pictured: The Azn Badger and "Dude Holding Umbrella."

The photo above was the first one I took while wearing the mask.

Not much to say about it, other than the fact that it was taken in the heart of downtown, and I was more than a little nervous about publicly making a fool of myself.

Pictured: The Azn Badger and "Awesome McElephant Face."

This was was also taken downtown, in a really neat part of town that played host to an incredible amount of FREE art galleries.

I had a lot of fun perusing the artwork and photography, however this photo; as well as another that had my buddy Mencius’ cousin striking a pose alongside me, were probably the highlight of my time in that district.

Pictured: The Azn Badger in front of an INFERIOR Uwajimaya.

This photo’s kind of funny because my expression is as much BWAAHHH!!! as it is disappointed.

I suppose it’s also worth noting that this is the only photo I took where I’m wearing my stinky El Santo shirt.

You see, upon setting out to see the Portland Uwajimaya; Mencius and I were under the impression that the store was going to be awesomely massive and far superior to our Seattle store.

Hell, up until we actually stepped inside the place, we were referring to it as the “SUPER Uwajimaya.”

Anyway, let it be known, downtown Seattle Uwajimaya kicks Portland Uwajimaya’s ass any day.

Though I have to say, the Portland Kinokuniya does have the advantage of having cuter employees…

CANDY BUS!!!

This one was just too perfect.

While traveling through Hawthorne, me an’ the Scooby Squad came across a sign pointing down an alley that read “Candy Bus.”

For whatever reason, I don’t have any pictures of said Candy Bus, however I will tell you this:

It is in fact a bus, and does indeed sell candy.

That novelty aside, I think the funniest part of this photo, is the fact that the “Candy Bus” sign is pointing at my cock.

If ever my dick were to have a pet name, I think “Candy Bus” would do pretty nicely…

Pictured: A 60 Second Portrait of The Azn Badger.

In case you’re curious, I got the above portrait done knowing full well that I was going to be using it as the finale to a blog post.

I’m really happy with how this portrait turned out.

I had it done at the Saturday Market in downtown Portland, and while it’s indeed quite well done; effectively capturing my facial structure and character (even with the mask on) pretty much as well as I could’ve hoped, probably the most incredible thing about it is the fact that it was drawn in 60 seconds.

I only paid 3 dollars for this portrait, making me tempted to say it’s the most value I’ve ever gotten for such a fair price.

 

 

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Waffle Window FTW

Let it be known, the Azn Badger loves him some waffles.

Whether it be waffles or pancakes, if the word “batter” is used in reference to it’s construction, and it’s fried with a pan; you can bet I’ll like it.

Despite this, for whatever reason I really haven’t had that many opportunities to eat me some waffles; in a restaurant or at home.

I can’t say when it’ll happen, but rest assured; I’ll have me some chicken and waffles someday, and that day will be GLORIOUS.

That being said, today I want to tell you about an awesome waffle spot I ran across during my short trip to Portland called The Waffle Window.

The real charm of The Waffle Window (besides the tasty waffles) lies in the fact that it really is exactly what it’s name implies; a waffle place operating out of a windowsill:

Waffles? Window? FUCK YES!

For whatever reason, I found the idea of a waffle joint catering to the walking crowd, the passerby customers; to be quite appealing.

As it so happens, my friends and I ran across The Waffle Window as we were touring the Hawthorne area; and I must say, it felt very nice to sit down for a quick waffle pit stop.

I myself ended up getting a Nutella and banana waffle, and was thoroughly satisfied.

Believe it or not, it was better than it looked...

During the few days I spent in Portland, I’m pretty sure The Waffle Window was the highlight of my trip.

Yeah I know, I’m boring like that…

Anyway, I’m no food critic, so I think I’m gonna’ cut this short and just say, I really fuckin’ liked The Waffle Window.

Check it out if you’re in the Hawthorne area of Portland.

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