Azn Badger's Blog

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Eclipse FAIL

Pictured: A photo of the lunar eclipse taken by Adam Gray.

Believe it or not, I actually took the time to haul my ass out of bed at 6 AM this morning to see the lunar eclipse.

On any other day, I wouldn’t have bothered waking up early on a Saturday to witness a natural phenomenon, but for whatever reason; I really wanted to do it this time.

Despite staying up till about 2 AM watching The Jackal on TV, (a truly awesome movie) I set my alarm for 6, and said to myself:

“That eclipse is boutsta’ get seen goddamnit!”

Well, as fate would have it, despite basically getting no sleep, I didn’t get to see the eclipse.

At 6 AM, I grabbed my camera and ran around the house, checking all the windows for signs of a puke orange moon.

No moon.

No eclipse.

After about 15 minutes of confusion, (Who the fuck loses a moon? Honestly…) I threw on a coat and slipped on my dad’s oversized shoes to go clomping around the neighborhood in search of the moon.

Nearly 30 minutes went by as I walked through the chilly morning weather in my shorts, stalking the skies in search the AWOL Earthly satellite.

At some point I spotted a woman jogging alongside her dog.

I attempted to give chase for about 10 seconds before realizing:

A): I was wearing my dirty-ass khaki shorts.

B): I was wearing my dad’s big-ass shoes.

and C): I was about to ask a stranger if they knew where the fucking moon was.

Add it all up, and you have the potential for an incident that may or may not involve the unwarranted use of pepper spray and/or a rape whistle.

Following this, I took one last look up at the radioactive orange sky, and decided to call it quits.

No moon.

No eclipse.

That being said, I’ve heard that the eclipse was difficult to spot on the West coast this morning, so I went ahead and provided the above photo for those of you that were curious to see what it looked like.

Hopefully you all were more successful than I this morning.

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