Azn Badger's Blog

What About the Lysine Contingency…?

Technical Difficulties

Remember that one post I did about the malware that wouldn’t die?

Well, as you may have guessed, it’s still not dead.

About a week ago, something hijacked my primary e-mail account and used it’s address book to send out some truly retarded, and wholly obvious spam messages.

I sincerely apologize if any of you reading this happen to have been affected by this unfortunate incident.

I’ve had that e-mail account since I was 13, and it felt truly fuckin’ creepy to have someone or something violate it in such a way.

I’m hoping it was the latter, as I most likely have sensitive materials in that account that could fuck my life up pretty good if they were tampered with.

I swear man, I’ve always felt that the internet was an evil and terrifying place full of the sort of assholes that would pour sugar in your gas tank just for the thrill of it, but this is really the first time I’ve ever felt directly attacked by one of “those” people.

Pictured: One of "those" people. Wearing power armor no less.

Stupid internet peoples… Fuckin’ with my shit…

Anyway, back to the malware!

It’s as it’s powers grow and adapt in direct response to my rage levels.

When I’m peeved, it’s kind of a bother.

When I’m fuming, “gonna’ ram my fist through the monitor” angry, it takes total control of my computer.

It should be noted, that this particular post is being manufactured on a different computer, as I found myself growing impatient in wrestling with my laptop to type every word.

Despite this, I had a minor breakthrough this evening, in the form of my discovery of some oddly titled and highly suspect hardware devices in my device manager.

I guess the big ass yellow exclamation points hovering over them should’ve tipped me off sooner, but oh well.

Give me a break, I’m not exactly the most technical of badgers.

Anyway, my hope is that my discovery will serve as the breadcrumbs to lead to this sleazy bitch’s doorstep.

Just like Ripley in Aliens, (well, except for the whole girl-on-horribly-grotesque-girl aspect of it…) I intend to storm that bitch’s hive and burn every last trace of her progeny.

Then I’ll watch my android buddy get torn in half, and later throw the bitch herself out the airlock and into stop-motion animated space.

Now if only I use a power loader to fight malware...

Fuck Newt though, she was a waste of my motherfuckin’ time…

Anyway, off I go to do battle with malware once again.

Wish me luck.

Filed under: Movies, Uncategorized, , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , ,

The Malware That Wouldn’t Die…

Ever had a Malware attack on your computer?

It’s a pain in the ass, ain’t it?

For the past year or so, I’ve had Malware attacks on my computer every couple of months or so.

I’m not sure if it’s a new one every time, or just a single, tenacious virus that continually goes dormant and resurfaces from time to time, but either way; Malware has been a thorn in my side for some time now.

Now, before you judge me, and call me some sort of technical newb or some shit; bear in mind that I am not a technical person.

Truth be told, I fuckin’ hate computers.

Honestly, if not for the computer being such an essential tool in this day and age; I really would prefer to stay away from them.

You see, computers; and indeed most of the software that run on them, are tools that deal in intangibles and rules.

For instance, when you’re working on say, Adobe Photoshop; you aren’t every actually putting your hands on the project you’re working on, rather you are manipulating the digital “object” within the confinements and restrictions of the toolset provided to you.

That’s where computers and the Azn Badger don’t mix.

You see, I tend to “feel my way around” most things in life.

I’m more of a sketch artist as opposed to a T-square wielding engineer.

I rarely ever use the right tool for the job, which often results in me getting things done; but not without exerting myself 10 times harder than I needed to.

That being said, when it comes to digital toolsets, or computers in general; you can’t really get away with this course of action.

You can’t “play” with a computer without first knowing “how.”

And that’s why things like Malware always manage to fuck me over for days, if not weeks at a time.

I’m familiar with the most basic means of combating them, however the Malware I’ve had for the past week or so has really got me on the ropes.

Needless to say, this new one is kind of tricky.

It’s far less visible than any other Malware/virus I’ve dealt with, largely because it doesn’t mess with my browser window or throw pop-ups at you like most others do.

No, this one is even courteous enough to give you an hour or so to play around on your computer before it affects anything at all.

Near as I can tell, whatever this thing is, it grabs hold of your memory and chokes it’s ass out, ’cause after an hour or so of tooling around on my computer; everything just grinds to a halt.

My main issue with this virus, is the fact that; despite the hour or so it gives me, that isn’t nearly long enough to run a virus scan.

My virus scan program, along with the whole computer, craps out probably 45 minutes to an hour before it can finish, allowing me to see that my computer is indeed infected, but not giving me enough time to quarantine/delete the infestation.

Some of the viruses that have been showing up in the scans (before it craps out mind you) are as follows:

Tracking Cookie



Gen-Deskryp [OSK]

Anyway, this has been yet another whiny rant from the Azn Badger.

Sorry about that.

I promise, the fun will return once I finally get my computer back to normal.


Filed under: Uncategorized, , , , , , , , , , , , , ,

Let’s Play Godzilla, Part VII

Godzilla fatigue has officially settled in.

For real, I ran out of things to say on the subject more than a few days ago, but this game just WON’T FUCKING END.

*Ahem!* Anyway, after today we’ve only got one more stage to go.

I can’t begin to tell you how happy I’ll be to start writing about something else…

Filed under: Games, Movies, Tokusatsu, Uncategorized, , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , ,

Let’s Play Godzilla, Part VI

Yesterday we played through Uranus, and it was cake.

Today however, we’re movin’ on to Pluto, and believe me, it’s no cakewalk.

Seriously man, it’s long as fuck!

For real, it took me 3 videos this time man!

Anyway, plenty of rants about Mechagodzilla, Super X, and the various composers of the Godzilla series are featured below:

Filed under: Games, Movies, Tokusatsu, Uncategorized, , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , ,

Let’s Play Godzilla, Part V

The Godzilla Let’s Play madness continues!

Today we’re gonna’ be stompin’ our way across the planet Uranus!

It’s a short level, but regardless, we’re GONNA’ BURN SOME MUSCLE!!!*

*Brownie points to all the dorks out there that get the reference…

Filed under: Games, Movies, Tokusatsu, Uncategorized, , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , ,

Let’s Play Godzilla, Part IV

Well, this is embarassing…

Today I got to wake up to a malware attack on my computer.

Not only that, but I spent the better part of an afternoon trying to remove it.

To make matters worse, part of that fucker is still lingering in my computer, making it completely incapable of any sort of internet connection; wired or otherwise.

That being said, as Megatron so famously said in Transformers: The Movie, “WAIT, I STILL FUNCTIOOOOOOONNNNN!!!” so I went ahead and made my Let’s Play video for the day.

However, when I tried to upload said videos via both of my parent’s computers, I was met with a frustrating error message along the lines of:

“Uh, we don’t know what the fuck you did, but you better cut it out; ’cause like, your video’s totally fucked man.”

Anyway, sorry guys, no videos for tonight.

Don’t worry though, as soon as Youtube get’s it’s thumb out it’s ass, I’ll update this post and we’ll all pretend like nothing happened…


Haha! VICTORY!!!

No sooner had I given up for the evening did I find a way to kill Mr. Malware!

Not only that, but I tried Youtube again, and maybe it’s just my computer being less-sucky than my parent’s, but the videos uploaded without a hitch!

Check ’em out below:

Filed under: Games, Movies, Tokusatsu, Uncategorized, , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , ,