Let’s get one thing straight: King Dedede is the shit.
Just check out his unbelievably pimptastic theme music that just happens to be the Best Boss Music for today’s post:
If you can’t appreciate the awesomeness that is a gigantic penguin wearing a kimono/Santa robe, while carrying an equally gigantic mallet, IN A WRESTLING RING mind you, then you can go fuck yourself.
Seriously, you better find yourself a Maglite or some shit to sit on, otherwise I’ll come find your ass.
*Ahem!* ANYWAY, King Dedede is of course, regular villain/rival character in the Kirby universe of games.
The fat fuck stole all the food in Dreamland!
Kid’s game or not, that is just about the coolest evil scheme I’ve ever heard of in videogames.
Unfortunately, that equally fat fuck, Kirby, shows up and saves the day, puking stars all over poor Dedede in his own wrestling arena.
This would prove to the norm for most Kirby games, of which there are far too many for me to cover in this article, let alone give two shits about.
I am fully aware that there are a shit ton of spin-offs and Japanese exclusive games, but like I said, I haven’t got the time, nor the testicular fortitude to write about all of that.
The one game I will talk about in detail however, is Kirby Superstar, as that is the game that plays host to the Best Boss Music track for today.
Taking full advantage of the Super NES’s enhanced capabilities, Superstar was packed to the brim with extra features to go with it’s improved graphics and sound.
With no real “main story mode,” Kirby Superstar nevertheless featured a whopping, 9 different modes of play.
Spring Breeze was the first mode unlocked, which was basically a Super NES remake of the original Kirby’s Dreamland.
This was followed by a mode called Dyna Blade, wherein Kirby embarks on a mission to calm a rampaging bird creature of the same name.
Next came Gourmet Race, which was a multi-heat platforming mode wherein Kirby and King Dedede must compete with one another to collect food while racing to the finish line.
The Great Cave Offensive was an especially unique and robust mode involving a romp through a massive cave while hunting or 60 treasure chests scattered throughout.
Revenge of Meta Knight was an especially difficult mode starring Meta Knight as the main villain, and featuring a dialogue-heavy plot line.
This was probably my favorite of the “story modes.”
Milky Way Wishes is the last of the story modes, involving Kirby’s battle against a comet named Nova using a Mega Man style weapon inventory.
The Arena was the Kirby equivalent to “boss rush” or “survival mode,” wherein the player’s task was simply to defeat the game’s boss character one after another with just one life.
The last two modes in the game were a pair of timing based mini-games called Samurai Kirby and Megaton Punch.
The objectives were to slash one’s opponent first,
or punch a stone slab the hardest respectively.
These modes took only a matter of seconds to complete, however this by no means meant they were easy.
On the contrary, they were quite difficult, but more importantly, they were crazy fun.
Smacking King Dedede upside the head with a party whistle, and literally punching the planet in half are gaming accomplishments that are hard to forget.
Aside from these last two mini-games, every other mode in the game had a co-op feature using Kirby’s powers of “pooping” out partner characters as a means of creating a second player character.
With all those modes, Kirby Superstar was a vibrant and incredibly varied platformer for it’s day.
Also, along with Kirby Superstar’s brilliant iteration of King Dedede’s theme, (easily my favorite version of it) the game had an overall kick-ass soundtrack.
Standouts include the remixed version of the Green Greens theme:
The Intro Stage of the Revenge of Meta Knight mode:
Not only that, but it’s also worth noting that the standard Boss theme would also be a decent competitor for Best Boss Music had it not been from the same game as King Dedede’s theme.