I pride myself on maintaining this blog as a source of entertainment.
This blog is not a journalistic venue, nor is it an online diary where I share my poetry and sad song lyrics.
Seriously, I can’t stand that self-important bullshit…
Anyway, despite my mission statement for this blog, tonight I feel the need to bring up something that’s been irking me for some time now:
What the fuck is up with Lego’s these days?
Everywhere I look, there’s fuckin’ “theme” Lego boxsets based on all sorts of mainstream pop-culture properties.
We’ve got Batman Legos.
We’ve got Harry Potter Legos.
And you better believe we’ve got every George “Control Freak” Lucas franchise imaginable in Lego form.
Not only that, we’ve also got videogames based, not just on the original source material; but specifically the Lego version of said intellectual properties.
Just what the fuck happened that made Legos so fuckin’ bankable?
In my day, Legos came in theme boxes, like “space Legos,” or “pirate Legos,” or in the later stages of my youth, crazy shit like “deep sea mining Legos vs. deep sea pirate legos.”
Despite a handful of specialized pieces, like the parts to make the sharks or crocodiles, or the various transparent parts for the space guys, none of these theme boxes ever came with unique parts.
Honestly, I think that’s the aspect of the whole “Legos of all of your favorite mainstream pop-culture icons!” deal.
It’s not the fact that the dirty Danes sitting on the Lego franchise are obviously making bank off of kids and fanboys buying up all of their Harry Potter and Star Wars memorabilia.
It’s the simple fact that, in recreating all of these pre-established characters and settings, they’ve gone ahead and made unique parts too accomodate said specific intellectual properties.
You know what my favorite part about Legos was as a kid?
Opening up my box of random pieces and taking shit like Play-Doe, and Magic Markers to them so I could make my own shit, my way.
Say I wanted to make a fuckin’ Darth Vader Lego man back in the day.
I would have to find the standard pieces that matched the character best, and then use my imagination to find a way to make my own Darth.
Nowadays, kids get handed a box of Legos, and they’re no longer handed a box of possibilities, they’re handed a box with Darth Vader, Harry Potter, and fuckin’ Batman, already pre-painted and pre-sculpted.
Shit, you as well be selling action figures, or model kits when you look at it that way.
Really fuckin’ blocky, and jaundice infected action figures, but action figures nonetheless…
Legos were always about giving kids a blank slate to let kids explore their imaginations in a constructive fashion.
Like giving a kid a slab of butcher paper and some crayons.
I don’t know, maybe I’m just overreacting and not having enough faith in the youths of today.
I guess if I look on the bright side of things, Lego box sets, not matter how “Lucas-ified” or “Potter-ized” they may be, still come with a hefty supply of standard Lego pieces.
Hopefully there’s kids out there that take time to put aside the shiny plastic-y goodness of their Harry Potter Lego men and take a moment to appreciate the fun that can be had when taking 2 random blocks and putting them together…Without the aid of an instruction manual.
*Apologies, malware is still tearing my computer a new asshole, so I had to use dad’s for the last half of the post, hence the lack of pictures and hyperlinks.*